When you’ve been insulted, annoyed, or someone’s just pissed you off its good to have a one-lined backhander to get them off your case. If your like me, those one-liners usually come after you’ve walked away and you’re kicking yourselves for them not coming to you sooner. Here’s the TOP 5 of some of the best one-liners I’ve heard or been told about:
- Woman A complained to Woman B that B had changed since being in her new relationship. Heated words were exchanged with Woman B accusing Woman A of being a “…jealous bitch”, seeing as she was single. Woman A then retorted, “At least I’m my own bitch and no-one else’s”.
- A seven year old girl was being taunted at school by a fellow pupil because she didn’t know her father. Unable to ignore the insults any more, she snapped, “I’d rather have no Dad, than your Dad”.
- Having been falsely accused by an irate woman of sleeping with her partner, Skye snorted, “Look love, I wouldn’t even sit on your blokes face, less alone sleep with him”.
- After being racially insulted, Jem proudly told her assailant, “Yes I am Black. I was born Black and will die Black. My name ain’t Michael Jackson you know”. (No offence to the late King of Pop, but I had to include this one – Donnatella)
- A couple were rowing about the guys whereabouts and what he’d been doing. Unsatisfied with his answers, the suspicious girlfriend told him… “You can’t even lie straight in bed, so don’t lie to my face”.
More Top 5’s by Donnatella